Adoption Stories

Finding Our Perfect Match: An Adoption Journey with the F Family and All About U Adoptions

The dream of building a family can take many forms. For the F Family, their path led them to adoption, and they wouldn’t have it any other way. In this heartwarming interview, they share their experience with All About U Adoptions, the challenges and triumphs of their adoption journey, and the beautiful open adoption relationships they’ve built.

Read on to learn how the F family found the perfect match for their hearts, the invaluable support they received from AAU, and the advice they have for other families considering adoption.

How did you find AAU Adoptions and what made you choose them?

We actually found AAU through the local agency (we live in the Washington DC area) we were using to do our home study and paperwork. We were looking for agencies that were serving birth moms and parents first and foremost and that was certainly the mindset of AAU.

What advice would you give to other families considering adoption?

Adoption expands your heart bigger than you thought it could go. I hear just having a kid does this (we don’t have any biological children) in general but I suspect it’s way more with adoption. Your love, and all the ups and downs that go with it, is just amplified. You grow your heart with your kids biological families and the AAU social workers and all the many people who share in this unique journey. Sometimes it’s really hard and sometimes it’s amazing on a level that’s, well, divine. But your heart is doing things you never thought it could do.

What services and resources did you find most beneficial working with AAU?

I am most grateful for how well the AAU staff take care of birth moms and families way past the actual adoption. I had assumed, and was right, that their support for birth families and us during the actual process would be amazing and they were. But that’s just the start of our adoption journey and AAU staying in touch with our family and our kids’ birth families has forged adoption connections that have continued every year to support our kids and their birth families. They even helped us with paperwork to enroll our children in their respective (Native American) tribes – years after the adoption.

What were some of the biggest challenges you faced during the adoption process, and how did you overcome them?

We were very lucky to face few logitsical challenges – we didn’t wait long, both adoptions went through as planned. One of the hardest parts was the 30 day revocation period in SD. visiting birth families many times during that process was so important and so fulfiling but also very nerve wracking and heavy on the heart.

What type of adoption openness do you share with the birth parents?

I text/facebook message regularly (once a month or so) with our daughters birth mom, dad & aunt, and our son’s birth mom. We send cards & send pictures digitally & with the cards. I talk all the time with our daughter’s 2 biological birth sisters who were also placed for adoption through AAU (one of them lives 7 minutes away so we see them often). We travel to South Dakota every year to see birth families.

Has open adoption worked for your family, and what advice would you give to families considering open adoption?

Open adoption has been incredibly helpful to our children (now 10 & 8.) All they know is this type of blended family and so there’s nothing secretive or surprising to them. For families considering, my advice would be that even though it might feel hard, like you’re “sharing” your kid with another parent, it’s incrediblly helpful to your kid and also for you – you can get to know traits and medical history that help you learn more about your kiddo.

Looking back, would you have done anything differently in your adoption journey?

On the whole, not at all. Though at some point during the adoption process for our first, someone noted that you should pick an adoption agency in a part of the country where you can travel to each year as you’ll likely head there each year. Now I can’t imagine not visiting South Dakota every year, but I will say that getting to Rapid City from the DC area takes a long time (no direct flights) and is very expensive (turns out many people want to visit SD in the warm months too!) so I see where that person’s advice was coming from.

Are there any lessons you’ve learned that you would like to share with other adoptive families?

It’s not as much lessons learned as a mindset that we had and I suspect many have as you brace for the fact that a birth parent may not go through with the adoption. We tried to really think of the whole act of adoption as serving the birth mom (& families). That we were there to serve her/them; if they decided not to go through with the placement, we were there to offer financial & emotional support (via AAU) during the difficult time of being pregnant & uncertain. And that was good, and right that birth moms always be at the center and have agency.

What advice would you give to families who are just beginning their adoption journey, particularly in terms of staying patient and hopeful throughout the process?

God is there through every step of this, for all involved. His love is manifested throughout and love takes many forms and can cause all sorts of emotions and that’s normal.

An Adoption Journey Full of Love and Growth

The F family’s story is a testament to the power of love, patience, and open hearts. If you’re considering adoption, their experiences and advice offer valuable insights into the process and the rewards that lie ahead.

We at All About U Adoptions are committed to supporting families throughout every step of their adoption journey. If you’re interested in learning more about adoption, please contact us today.

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